Whenever I hear this, I think about my son-in-law. I love my son-in-law and am so proud of the man, husband, and father he has become despite his awful upbringing.
He was raised in a very dysfunctional family. His mother suffered from mental illness and his father was an alcoholic. Some of the stories that he and his 2 siblings tell are horrifying. His family moved from place to place always outrunning the last landlord. They lived in rundown apartments, hotels, their car, and once in an auto repair garage that his dad’s friend owned. They often didn’t have enough to eat and would make friends with neighbor kids hoping to be invited over for dinner.
He once told my daughter that she grew up “with a silver spoon in her mouth.” She laughed at that. She reminded him that she grew up in a small house with a single mom. How could he call that a silver spoon?
“Did you grow up in the same house your whole childhood?” he asked.
She had.
“Did you always have food, heat, and a bed to sleep in every night?”
She had.
“Was your electricity ever turned off?”
It never was.
“Exactly,” he replied, “Silver spoon.”
The amazing thing about this story is where these 3 siblings ended up. My son-in-law owns a successful moving business. His sister has a college degree and works as an addiction counselor. His brother is an adjunct college professor, is working on his PhD, and volunteers much of his time working to combat human trafficking.
The fact that they were able to work through their childhood trauma and find a way to live successful lives is truly an inspiration. It gives me hope that some of my students who are living with trauma now might find a way through it and be able to emerge on the other side of it.